The Husband's Role Part I (What is it?)

To completely "put on" the role of a biblical wife, you must understand the role that God ordained for husbands.

Wives are to submit to their husbands as if he were the Lord, and husbands are to lead according to the example Jesus set. Jesus loved his church so much He DIED for it! Your husband is commanded to show you this type of love!

Ephesians 5 22-27

22Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.

So what ARE the husband's roles/duties? Please note, this is NOT intended to be a complete list. I'm sure I missed many.

1. Preacher of the home (manages family well) [1 Timothy 3:4-5]
2. Provider for his household (men should work and be bread-winners) [1 Timothy 5:8]
3. Leads his family [1 Cor 11:3]
4. Loves his wife as much as Christ loved the church (Christ DIED for His
   church) [Ephesians 5:25]
5. Is not harsh with his wife [Col 3:19]
6. Lives with wife in understanding and knowledge (tries to understand her
   needs) [1 Peter 3:7]
7. Must see that his children obey him with proper respect [1 Timothy 3:4]
8. Husband of one wife [1 Timothy 3:2]
9. Temperate (not prone to massive mood swings) [1 Timothy 3:2]
10. Self-controlled [1 Timothy 3:2]
11. Respectable [1 Timothy 3:2]
12. Hospitable [1 Timothy 3:2]
13. Able to teach (knows the Lord's Word) [1 Timothy 3:2]
14. Not given to drunkenness [1 Timothy 3:3]
15. Not violent but gentle (not wife-beaters) [1 Timothy 3:3]
16. Not quarrelsome [1 Timothy 3:3]
17. Not a lover of money [1 Timothy 3:3]
18. Good reputation [1 Timothy 3:6]
19. Should not be conceited [1 Timothy 3:6]
20. Sincere [1 Timothy 3:8]
21. Doesn't pursue dishonest gain [1 Timothy 3:8]
22. Holds the truths of the faith strongly [1 Timothy 3:9]
23. Will be held accountable [1 Corinthians 4:1-2]
24. Treats wife as the weaker vessel [1 Peter 3:7]
25. Disciplines children (spare the rod spoil the child) [many verses in
    Proverbs]
26. Considerate of wife [1 Peter 3:7]
27. Has prayers hindered when inconsiderate [1 Peter 3:7]
28. Loves his wife as much as his own body [Ephesians 5:28]
29. Remembers his wife is his equal in receiving God's blessings [1
    Peter 3:7]
30. Punished through hard work (in part, because wife led and did not
    follow!) [Genesis 3:17]
31. Leaves his father and mother and cleaves to his wife (does not allow in-laws
    to meddle) [Ephesians 5:21]
32. Doesn't divorce his wife [Mark 10:11]
33. Provides his wife sex whenever she desires it [1 Corinthians 7:3]

Are you thinking to yourself, "Wow, if my husband was doing all that I could EASILY submit to and obey him as if he were the Lord."?

That's just one more lie to expose: How often do we make mistakes and not obey Jesus, and he was perfect! Our husbands are human and flawed. Submission may never be easy.

Despite that, I'm sure every wife can scan that list and agree that if we have to submit to our husbands (and we do), we want our husbands to be those things. We want him to try and understand us. We want him to be temperate, sincere, and thoughtful. We recognize that if he does the things the bible commands him to do, and we do the things the bible commands us to do, that BOTH of our lives (not to mention our children's!) would be drastically improved! We recognize that God really does want the best for us.

But what do Christian wives do when their husbands are failing in their roles, or perhaps don't even believe in the Word? I'll tackle that in my next post.